Breathing! It is automatic. Our body just does it but not without a little assist from our emotions or state of being.
My mom was really stressed a couple of days ago. So stressed that her breathing became very rapid and shallow. The longer her breathing was controlled by her anxiety, the less oxygen she had available which caused an inability to focus which caused more stress which caused quicker and shallower respiration.
When she was prompted to breathe slow and deep, she calmed down and relaxed. Then she would start to think about all the things that were troubling her and the cycle would start all over again.
Yesterday, I discovered there were eleven messages on my Iphone. I turned off notifications one day while the baby was asleep and (20 lashes) I never looked or turned it back on.
There were two calls from a dear friend from high school. He called last week to tell me he was in Intensive Care at a hospital; his COPD out of control. Maybe I should say his COPD had taken control and he was having a great deal of trouble breathing. He called again yesterday while I was at my folk's house; no cell service out in the boodocks so didn't get his call.
When I got home, all the calls made to me during the day came in. Phone was vibrating like it was the end of the world. I checked messages. He is still in ICU. We talked for 4 minutes and he had to stop to put O2 mask on twice during the call. He called to wish me happy birthday but could barely speak.
My mom's breathe was lost by stress and anxiety. My friend, Mike's breathe was lost by 40 years of smoking.
On the flip side, some of us lose our breath by the sight of the ocean, or a newborn baby, or a purple/orange sunrise.
I lose my breath in high places. Probably from the scream that releases all the air and then I can't get any air back in my lungs until I step way, way, way, way, way from the edge. I lose my breath from some of the magical things of life. Rocky Mountains, mountain rivers and brooks, poppies that turn a whole field orange, the sight of a mother nursing her child with love in her eyes, a father playing with his kids.
My lungs stay perfectly still, holding the inhale or exhale, when a butterfly or dragonfly lands on my hand or arm.
What takes your breath away? Is it anxiety, a lifetime of bad habits or is it wonder and beauty? Maybe it is a little bit of both?
My mom was really stressed a couple of days ago. So stressed that her breathing became very rapid and shallow. The longer her breathing was controlled by her anxiety, the less oxygen she had available which caused an inability to focus which caused more stress which caused quicker and shallower respiration.
When she was prompted to breathe slow and deep, she calmed down and relaxed. Then she would start to think about all the things that were troubling her and the cycle would start all over again.
Yesterday, I discovered there were eleven messages on my Iphone. I turned off notifications one day while the baby was asleep and (20 lashes) I never looked or turned it back on.
There were two calls from a dear friend from high school. He called last week to tell me he was in Intensive Care at a hospital; his COPD out of control. Maybe I should say his COPD had taken control and he was having a great deal of trouble breathing. He called again yesterday while I was at my folk's house; no cell service out in the boodocks so didn't get his call.
When I got home, all the calls made to me during the day came in. Phone was vibrating like it was the end of the world. I checked messages. He is still in ICU. We talked for 4 minutes and he had to stop to put O2 mask on twice during the call. He called to wish me happy birthday but could barely speak.
My mom's breathe was lost by stress and anxiety. My friend, Mike's breathe was lost by 40 years of smoking.
On the flip side, some of us lose our breath by the sight of the ocean, or a newborn baby, or a purple/orange sunrise.
I lose my breath in high places. Probably from the scream that releases all the air and then I can't get any air back in my lungs until I step way, way, way, way, way from the edge. I lose my breath from some of the magical things of life. Rocky Mountains, mountain rivers and brooks, poppies that turn a whole field orange, the sight of a mother nursing her child with love in her eyes, a father playing with his kids.
My lungs stay perfectly still, holding the inhale or exhale, when a butterfly or dragonfly lands on my hand or arm.
What takes your breath away? Is it anxiety, a lifetime of bad habits or is it wonder and beauty? Maybe it is a little bit of both?
Just read Bob's post at I Should Be Laughing (see link on right column). OMG, the title alone stopped me from breathing and then I couldn't stop laughing. Don't miss it!
ReplyDeleteYou take my breath away
ReplyDeleteThank you, my love! Nice surprise! I love you.
Deletebad breath away - this frigid cold bothers my asthma; I must be VERY careful or I will wind up in the ER
ReplyDeletegood breath away - a handsome man, an unexpected compliment, a beautiful sunrise/sunset, the vast oceans
Frigid cold is gruesome. Can't imagine asthma and icy air. Stay inside, no ER!
DeleteLove those sunsets and sunrises. Tonight's sunset was incredible but only lasted a couple of minutes. Didn't get home with enough time to grab a camera.
My husband take my breath. Still. When we're old and grey I imagine we'll still be that way with each other. In the retirement home.
ReplyDeleteBodies of water, the ocean, a beautiful beach...they take my breath away. A good laugh takes my breath away. Sometimes I laugh so hard that I hard trouble breathing.
And although I don't suffer from anxiety, the thought of something happening to one of my daughters takes makes me struggle to breathe.
And on and on it goes...
I love that your husband still does it for you. It's precious to grow old with someone you love so much.
DeleteHard to breathe if we imagine anything but wonderfulness happening to our children, just part of a mother's heart strings. I wouldn't give up those strings for anything.
So far, only wonder and beauty take my breath away. I hope that remains the case for a long time.
ReplyDeleteGlad to hear it. Wonder and beauty, if we are awake and paying attention, should always take our breath away!
DeleteI lose my breath to beauty and joy and things i find raucously funny.
ReplyDeleteI rarely lose my breath in bad times ... and that sound you hear is me, knocking on wood.
PS Glad the Nadkins, at least i think it was the Nadkins, made you laugh so hard!
Raucously funny is a great breath stopper and, yes, it was the Nadkins that still have me laughing. Our whole household has been laughing about your post and Nadkins! Mostly, we've just been repeating, "if they're happy, you're happy!" Great post.
DeleteI did it today; I went out and walked in the fierce cold. It took me awhile to recover.
ReplyDeleteBrave woman! Color me huddled under 4 lap blankets coddling a hot cup of tea! I'd probably bite off my tongue from shivering!
DeleteSunrise and sunset in the desert outside of Taos and Santa Fe. The colors are simply stunning and change magically. Also, the controlled chaos of the drip paintings by Jackson Pollock and the monumental scale of the painting in the Clyfford Still Museum.
ReplyDeleteAnything around Taos is a turn on for me. Love, love, love New Mexico.
DeleteAn "I Love You" from my son and granddaughters. A gentle touch on my back in the night. Dolphins close to the shore. Hearing my late husbands voice on an audio tape.
ReplyDelete"I love you" is the best. Our 19 month old great granddaughter says it to us every night, soooo special!
DeleteLove the dolphins close to shore, too. Doesn't it make you want to dive in and swim with them?
Anxiety, typically. For the most part, I'm so dead to the beauty of everything that nothing that's my breath away, not really. I mean, it's nice, but yeah. Anxiety. Wonderful stuff, that. Give my condolences to your ma. :/
ReplyDeleteMadilyn, my heart breaks for you. Anxiety paralyzes so many. I hope you can soon see the beauty, even in the shadows.
DeleteIt's a little bit of both. Sorry to hear about your mom and your friend. I most recently felt my breathing stop when I thought my dad was dying. Stopped me in my tracks as I walking my dog. Fortunately, he's doing better but he still has a long road of recovery to go. Take care.
ReplyDeleteI hope your dad is making strides on that long road. It is scary when are parents are aging, scary for them and us. Special thoughts to you both.
Deletehope your mom is feeling better now dear,and you are so lucky to have such loving friend who remembered your birth day when someone forget almost everything ,and yes same tings take my breath away as you mentioned dear
ReplyDelete