Showing posts with label Nurture. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Nurture. Show all posts

July 01, 2014

Filling My Cup

Shouldn't one have to purchase a ticket, stand in line and willingly board a roller coaster if they want a ride?

Life has a habit now and then of grabbing one by the scruff of the neck (or elsewhere), tossing and buckling you into the back seat of a chute-the-chute; then standing back to watch the show.

The final two weeks of June, 2014 was filled with ups and downs and twists and turns. Not that I can't handle ups and downs and twists and turns. In fact, I think I am pretty good at it but, dang gum; when life shoves six months of living into a two week Big Dipper, a person's nerves get a little raw!

The final twist of the coaster ride was to be a two-day workshop in Lodi. We headed for the workshop on Friday but to be honest, I had lost my zeal for the seminar, even though I had really anxiously been looking forward to it for months. If I had seen an infomercial for

 Instant Zest and Zeal
Free for only $19.99 plus shipping and handling
I would have dialed up and ordered 10!

My eyes were swollen from crying, happy tears and sad tears, angry tears and tears "just because"!
My cup was empty. At one point, my poor husband stopped to grab lunch in a drive-thru. He nonchalantly asked me what I wanted! I burst into tears! Uncontrollable tears rolling down my expertly applied make-up from eyes already the size of golf balls!

He got me a large coke and a burger with extra onions! He knows how to make me happy.

I am usually a cup-runneth-over kind of gal but my cup was empty and raw!

The workshop was great. Aha's and epiphanies going off everywhere. I think it was Socrates that is quoted for saying an unexamined life is not worth living. He would have lifted his toga and danced, danced, danced after this class.

Class was great, learned a lot; still cried and melted down a couple of times.

We climb into car and head for home...or so I thought! Half-way home my husband pulls into a Target parking lot, grabs my hand and pulls me in. He gets a cart, drops two sleeping bags into it, two large waters and a box of granola bars.

"We're going camping!" he announces!  "I've always wanted to photograph Hat Lake at sunrise!"


Off we head to Lassen. No tent, no stove, NO RESERVATIONS on the weekend before the 4th of July and clothing completely inappropriate for mountaineering!  BUT....don't you like how there always seems to be a BUT in life's circumstances! But, mountains fill my cup! Mountains, starry nights in the mountains, the smell of camp fires (even if they are someone else's smoke!).

We pull into Lassen Park, find a site at the third or fourth campground. We put the seats down, crawled into our brand new sleeping bags and fell asleep watching a sky filled with bright shiny stars.

Just before sunrise, I woke Frank up. "Honey, I see a glow on the horizon, we should drive over to Hat Lake." He opened his eyes, smiled at me and was asleep, all in one breath!  I climbed into front seat and drove the two or three miles to Hat Lake.

What a beautiful day. Hat Lake was gorgeous, Lassen, as always, was majestic. We took some back roads once we were out of the park and discovered some meadows and vistas that could only be described as paradise. We also discovered how easily it is to get lost if you wander off of A Line. If you plan on wandering off of A Line, you should let someone know!

Our cups are full again. Thank God for mountains and lakes, for majesty and simplicity and mostly, for perceptive husbands!  Side note: hiking in gold dress-shoes isn't suggested but if that's all you got, what the hell!

"That's been one of my mantras - focus and simplicity. Simple can be harder than complex. You have to work hard to get your thinking clean to make it simple. But it's worth it in the end because once you get there, you can move mountains."
Steve Jobs

"Great things are done when men meet mountains." William Blake

"My father considered a walk among the mountains as the equivalent of churchgoing." Aldous Huxley

My father was much different than Huxley's. My father taught me that walking in the mountains was God's church. He taught me that we go to church to talk to God
but we go to the mountains to listen to God.

Mountains, wilderness, wild flowers, little streams creating their own songs; all of it talks to my spirit.


My kids once asked me what they should do with my ashes after I'm gone. I told them I couldn't care less. I've changed my mind and would really like my ashes scattered in the mountains amongst the trees and granite; in the arms of God and Mother Nature. That might make being in heaven that much more special!


Where do you go to refill your cup?  What feeds your spirit and your soul?


June 16, 2014

Family Is Good For The Heart

When I sit in a room, filled with my grandchildren, children and their spouses, I am overwhelmed by the sense of contentment and joy.


I wish I could tell you all the times one granddaughter or another would wrap her arms around me and whisper, "I love you, Nana!" Or sat next to me on the couch, held my hand with a nice squeeze. Or snuck me a spoonful of cookie dough! The pure joy it is to have my grandson hug me and tell me he can't wait for his baby to meet me.

As usual, many conversations were carried on with sprinkles of movie quotes here and there, though the quotes are leaning toward contemporary movies and less from 1980's and 90's flicks. I don't remember hearing, "Good news! Your friend is only mostly dead!" Not once! But I did hear, "And Darth Vader was all WHAAAAAA?"


Late at night, I could lay in bed and hear whispered girl-talk floating down the hall. Whispers would then drop to barely audible but I could hear tiptoeing on the hardwood floors, the silverware drawer slide open ever-so-slow. I couldn't hear the cookie dough container pop open but the complete silence told me the chocolate chip midnight raid was a success!

No one would have ever known. Dough container was back in fridge in morning, no dough in sleeping bags or on upper lips. There were the spoons in the sink, though, trails of cookie dough and licks on them.  It was obvious the caper was a success and the spoons might have been their calling card; a way of saying, "thanks for getting us the cookie dough, Nana! It was yummy!"


I am thankful for each and every one of the members of my family. If Karma was a big thing in my life, I would swear that in a past life I must have been a national hero of some kind. My rewards in this life are abundant! My life is truly blessed. My cup runneth over for I am a rich, rich, rich woman.

August 27, 2008

Maybe its just me....





Okay, I'm already in a mood and my attitude is kind of stinky but did anyone notice the ad banner at the top of your myspace this morning about "Relief for tired parents"? A sleeping drug for children?

I don't get it. When my children were little and they couldn't sleep I held them on my lap and rocked them, or rubbed their backs and sang to them. When my grandchildren can't sleep I hold them and rock them or I go to bed with them and rub their backs and sing a little song. Yeah, I get tired and yeah, I want to go to sleep because I have work in the morning or whatever but god damn it...

Okay, going to take some deep breaths and try to calm down.....Dear Father/Mother/God keep the idiots out of my way today.